Cheer Here: The Pains of Motherhood

Young motherhood, with its challenges and difficulties, finds a lot of good company. On Pinterest, Facebook, and mom blogs, you can find plenty of people to commiserate with and advice to guide you (or frustrate you, perhaps). This all goes to show that motherhood can be painful. We don’t get a lot of sleep, we’re at someone’s beck and call 24/7, and we don’t even get paid for it! 😉 The thing I’d like to propose about motherhood and its inherent challenges, though, is that perhaps the pain of it all doesn’t necessarily need fixing.

This pain has its place, I believe. The daily challenges that are so hard teaches us things that are valuable. Pain has a way of being a teacher. I hate feeling the pain of daily motherhood, but I sure love what it has done to me.

Motherhood is a crucible; it refines you through fire.

I have a friend who told me her story once. It was an incredible story of a mother overcoming impossible circumstances. She had six children and was pregnant when she left her abusive husband. She was essentially homeless and depending on the goodwill of others while still growing her family and attempting to support it. I’m fairly certain living her life would have broken me. Luckily, things are better for her now.

Before I even knew this woman, or heard her story, I remember seeing her across a room and just thinking “Wow, there’s something about her.” She had that special look in her eye, and carried herself with dignity (and a little sass). I remember wanting to get to know her and being drawn to her inner magnetic strength.

The crucible of her journey through motherhood (and life) is what refined her. The pain that we so often seek to avoid and self-pity we feel for ourselves when going through trials is often the tool we need to embrace to build a better and stronger character. 

No matter how many mom hacks, pro tips, or gadgets we embrace to assist our mothering choices, there is always going to be a day-in-day-out drudgery you can’t avoid. Someday, you’ll look back and realize that you did it. You got through it. That’s the crucible. That’s what burns away all the things you don’t need: self-doubt, excessive worry, self-centeredness, despair. And when you get through a crucible, you’re left with the very core of yourself, and that’s honestly all you need in the end – YOU, unhindered.

How does Marabou support women?

Moms who used to “lie-in” for forty days now have to pick themselves up within a week to get back to work. Grandmas, sisters and best friends who otherwise would have been there to help a woman transition into motherhood now live too far away and often can’t take time away from their full time job. Household chores and caring for older children fall on the woman who just delivered a new life and whose body needs rest. But we live in a sprawled world and helping hands are plentiful but often too far to be of benefit. 

Marabou Services is a unique gift registry which provides services instead of stuff. Most mom’s get too many onesies, too many baby blankets and not enough helping hands. How can you give you daughter living in Japan married to a Navy sailor a helping hand? How can you lend a hand to your best friend who moved to California? How do you ask for help when none of your family lives near you anymore?

Start a Marabou Gift Registry!

With a Marabou gift registry you can ask for any service you know will be of benefit during postpartum recovery.

Postpartum doulas for a first time mom

House cleanings for moms of multiples

Childcare for moms with older children!

Once your registry is created, add it to any other registry or post it to your Facebook and ask that your friends and family contribute to your postpartum service, rather than buying you more stuff.

More and more moms find they have to figure out postpartum alone. Women don't have the same support like they used to. Is it any wonder why PMDs are on the rise? Women are embittered by the journey through motherhood simply because no one was there to lend a hand.